Pink Hearts and Mother's Day

Bunny was extra-sweet on Mother’s Day. She was on her best behavior. As we walked, she kept holding my hand and kissing it. For a present, she picked out a new faceplate for my cell phone—pink hearts.

I told her how much I loved the extra attention and her good manners.

Mommy Bunny: I love the phone, Bunny. It’s great!
Bunny: I picked it out, ‘cuz I love you.
Mommy Bunny: I love you, too, little Bunny.
Bunny: And I’m havin’ good manners ‘cuz I love you.
Mommy Bunny: Thanks, sweetheart.
Bunny: But I’m ruining Daddy’s life.

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Strangers Beware

A few weeks back, Bunny and I were at the grocery store. As we were leaving, a Creepy Man in a bright yellow jacket approached us. Creepy Man tried telling us a joke or two. We smiled politely and moved on.

In the parking lot, Bunny and I had a talk about strangers.

Mommy Bunny: What would you do if a stranger tried to talk to you?

Bunny: I’d scream “Stranger!” and run away.

MB: Good. Now what if a stranger tried to grab you?

Bunny: I’d beat his ass.

MB: Good answer.

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Who's the Boss Here, Anyway?

Tonight, we once again found ourselves at Home Depot. Daddy Bunny went there first, and I brought the Bunny with me about an hour later.

On our way to Home Depot, an idiot woman driver ran me and two other cars off the road because she can't talk and drive at the same time. At one point, I thought Bunny and I were goners. We made it through without a scratch, but I was shaking when we made it to Home Depot. Little Bunny was oblivious.

Once we got in, we found Daddy Bunny just fine. Bunny ran up to her Daddy, and they kissed and hugged. I butted in, because I needed some consolation of my own. Daddy Bunny realized I was a wreck, and as he hugged me, asked what was wrong.

MOMMY BUNNY: OhMyGOD! Youwillnotbelievewhatjust-
TOTALidiot! Ranthreecarsoffthe-

DADDY BUNNY: It's okay. You're okay.

MOMMY BUNNY: thoughtweweregonnadie- Sheswerved-
Isawthecars- Knewshewasgonna-

BUNNY: Hey, Daddy. I wanna show you something.

MOMMY BUNNY: Can'tbelieveshe- Three cars! CELLPHONE!
Stupid JERK!

I then collapsed in Daddy Bunny's arms. Bunny saw her moment, and took it.

BUNNY: Daddy! I wanna show you something!

DADDY BUNNY: Not now, sweetheart. It's going to have to wait. After Mommy feels better.

BUNNY: Man, you're bossy.

It was just what we needed to break the tension. Thanks, Bunny.

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Stonegate and Bronze Statue

Over the past few months, we’ve been doing a lot of home construction. Our treks to Home Depot are pretty frequent. One week I went to the Depot three times a day. After a while, I think they thought I was shoplifting.

So, on one of our numerous trips to the Depot, I elected to stay in the car. Daddy Bunny took the Bunny in. They must have stopped near the paint department, because when she came out, she had a bunch of paint sample cards. Most were vibrant and from Disney, but two were from Ralph Lauren. She handed me a pretty copper color card.

Bunny: Mommy, this is for you.

Mommy Bunny: Thanks, Bunny. It’s so pretty.

Bunny: Yeah. It matches your eyes.

I checked in the mirror. The color wasn’t a close match—it was an exact match. I was floored. She then handed Daddy Bunny a card that matched his eyes.

Daddy Bunny and I discussed the incident later. If you put a gun to my head and told me to pick out the paint color that matched my eyes, without being able to compare it, I don’t know if I would have been able to do it. Yet, Bunny went in the store, and picked out two paint samples without a reference—and nailed it.

The Bunny never ceases to amaze.

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Scarred for Life

Tonight was the first time we’ve heard of the TV show “Scarred”. For those of you who haven’t seen it, it’s actual video of people doing stupid things, getting really hurt, and going to the hospital. They also interview these dimwits, who tell about their experiences getting scarred.

I guess there was a Scarred marathon on, because it was on for several hours in a row. We checked in on one episode during commercial breaks from another show, and found it fairly interesting, yet slightly disturbing. Like watching a train wreck, sometimes it was hard to look away.

So after our show was over, I decided to check out a full episode of Scarred. In the intro, they showed four crazy accidents, one of which left a skateboarder with bones visibly sticking out of his hand. Suddenly, I lost interest in watching the show. Bunny walked in to see what all the fuss what about. Our conversation unfolded thusly:

Mommy Bunny: YUCK!

Daddy Bunny: I take it you're not watching Scarred?

Mommy Bunny: Nah. I think I’m going to watch Scrubs. I have no need to see some guy with bones sticking out of his hand.

Bunny: Well, sometimes I do.

What a nut. Gotta love her.

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